The pills were those capsule ones with the two different colours. They were in an orange-tinted plastic jar and the lid was white with a child lock. The warning label read 'highly addictive during prolonged use' explaining why the jar could contain no more than about 20 pills. But I was more concerned about my desperation to get Andrea and everything related to him out of my head.

Leo had put them on the highest shelf. I'd have to climb to reach them and right now, I could hardly even stand. So all I did was stare at them for over half an hour. The silence in the room was excruciating. My ears rang with the voices of Andrea and Luciano and Alessio and Julia and Chico and so many more and with every blink, I saw his face. Sometimes he was grinning or laughing sometimes he was glaring and growling. Whatever it was, it made my heart wretch and my fear spike.

I couldn't take it anymore.

I stood up, my head spun and my legs buckled but I was already half a metre closer to the pills.

Before I could reach for them, I felt myself fall and land straight back onto the bed as I let out a frustrated sob. I couldn't carry my own weight and it was so infuriating. After crawling back under the covers, I let myself cry until I had to tears left at which point I just lay silently.

Another half an hour later, my vacant staring was interrupted.

The door opened, a man marched in, slammed the door behind him and closed the blinds to the window looking out into the hallway.

"I'm not supposed to be here," he said. "I climbed up a tree, along a ledge and through a window to get in and I can't stay long but I just had to see you."

Luca.

I smiled, "I'm happy you did."

His lips curled into a smile too, "How are you?" he asked.

I sighed, "I've been better."

My eyes were probably puffy and my cheeks tear-stained. He was only asking out of good manners.

He sighed before he pushed forward a bunch of flowers in his hand. They were wilted and many of the stalks bent or broken.

"They didn't really survive the journey," he said, with gritted teeth. "But I thought you might like them.copy right hot novel pub